Stop stabbing your beautiful mornings with cranky cries! Become a guide.
Is your child troubling you by laying down the law about her clothing choices? If yes, don’t let your heart sink! I’m sure you are not the only mother saying yes to this question. With so much to do around the house – from baby care to households, I’m sure it wouldn’t be easy for you to understand how things and life changes and how these changes bring taste to your life.
Today, a lot of mothers complain about their kids being bossy especially when it comes to choosing clothes for the day. Annie, a mother of a three-year-old daughter from Australia, says,
“Natalia goes crazy if I don’t let her wear clothes of her choice. And the worst day was when she stripped herself in the car and refused to enter her nursery. I was devastated with her stubbornness and resilience. She makes my initial day-start miserable and sometimes, I am scared of my mornings.”
Now, Annie and her daughter are not exceptions. Every next mother faces this clothes-selection-tantrums somewhere between 3 to 10 years of her child’s age. It is the hardest of times when you see your child overruling your selection, and you suddenly realize that your child is disobeying you. A lot of mothers take it too seriously and make it a matter of integrity, but if you sit back and concentrate on the choices they make, it is amazing to see that they are fashionistas, and pretty good at pairing up odd clothes into perfect sets. Isn’t it great? They may miss out sometimes, but there’s nothing wrong with failing and learning. Let them hit and have commented on their dressing sense. Always remember, children are keen observers, and they pick everything they see. This help them improve with time.
Julie, a mother of twin daughters, Emily and Millie, wrote, “They are clothing monsters, and they make me chew stones if I go against their choices. They love wearing Disney costumes and once they went in Disney Princess costumes to the Pirate themed party. I was embarrassed and so were they. But I felt that it was a great opportunity for them to realize that there’s always the right dressing for each day. I can observe changes and the number of showdowns have decreased; I’m glad they are learning.”
Alanna Levine, M.D., a spokeswoman for the American Academy of Pediatrics says, “If your child has got vocal over clothing and their preferences, it’s great news. It is one of the signs that your child is developing natural responses. And to practice, they assert their independence and test limits. So I believe, there is nothing wrong in being flexible with their choices. However, any everyday showdown must be addressed properly”.
Knowing the fact that they are too young to decides what to wear, you can’t help the situation. The best you could do is observe patience and remain composed over issues. There are ways to attend these growing behavioral changes while maintaining a healthy mother-child relationship which is much needed to survive in the long run.
Listen to your child’s likes and dislikes:
Letting children speak about their likes and dislikes will help you understand their taste better and within a few weeks’ time, you’ll get used to of their choices. Giving them an ear will empower them to speak their heart and respect values. Discuss their choices and the need of time and if they pick a combo that’s not workable, tell them what you think is better. Don’t deny their choices. Your child may not want to wear heavy thick fur coat inside the house because they aren’t aware of the cold outside. Don’t panic, take it along, they’ll soon ask once they step outside.
Offer them better options:
Sometimes, mothers are too strict about what people would think. It’s your mind trap, and the sooner you get out of it, the better it is. Observe your child about what combos or selection they make. If you find it weird, don’t express! In fact, show them what you think would look better. With time, they will learn setting up the right color palette, but also, your hand for better options will enable them to build trust with you. If they have made the right choice, admire how your sweetie chose the combination of the dress and looked the gorgeous among all or your handsome hunk knocked down all the beautiful girls by his way of dressing which was created by him only.
Make it fun:
This is funny and time-consuming but doesn’t forget that you are trying to avoid a long, day stretching cranky cries. If you are short of time every morning, observe this fun making a night ahead. Play half a minute game! Challenge them about their choices and see what they pick in half a minutes’ time. If they have made a right choice, reward them with extra chocolates. If you find it odd, let them try again.
Value your child’s individuality:
Maria Daultana, a mother of a baby girl, shared a note, “We were preparing for a Christian Wedding in Chicago when my baby lay down for an Eastern outfit. I tried hard to convince her for a white lace dress, but she didn’t move an inch. With a heavy heart, I dressed her in ‘Lehanga’ but to my utter surprise, it worked out well. The minute we entered and by the time we left, she stood out of the crowd. She was the star of the day! The bride who’s my friend Kelly demanded an exclusive photo with my daughter. I learned that my child was praised for her individuality.”
Dear moms, stop weighing your child and his/her preferences on the same scale. Each child is different and may find things differently. Let them be themselves. It is your responsibility to appreciate your child’s individuality and nurture them as a responsible social living being. With a little share of determination and patience, you can move mountains!
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